Let’s Get Intimate

 Posted by at 12:48 am  Nick's Blog
Jul 112022
 

I have said many times here in the blog that every night before we go to bed, Miss Terry and I cuddle for at least half an hour or so, and the last thing we say to each other before we go to sleep is, “I love you.” We go to sleep with me spooning her, and when one or the other of us gets up to go to the bathroom during the night when they get back into bed, our hands automatically find each other, and we hold hands in our sleep. The same thing in the morning, the first thing we say to each other is “I love you,” and we cuddle for at least half an hour or so.

You might think that’s only for young lovers or people in their first year or two of marriage, but we’ll be celebrating our 25th anniversary in January, and this year we both turn 70, so I guess that’s not necessarily so. I believe it’s important to have intimacy like that in a relationship, though more than one person has told us that we are codependent. Maybe so, but that’s okay. It works for us.

The reason I bring this up is because in an online writers group I belong to, a young author who has not been in a long-term relationship was asking those of us who are what kind of routines we have when it comes to things like that. I shared how Terry and I do things, and other people talked about their relationships, but the response from one author surprised a lot of people.

She said that she and her husband have been married for 14 years and there is absolutely “none of that nonsense.” According to her, they have a close relationship and both enjoy sex two or three times a week, but once that is over with, she doesn’t want him touching her or holding her or any of that “mushy stuff” because they are not a couple of “silly teenagers.” Someone asked what about romance, and the woman said that romance was way overrated and that on their first anniversary, her husband brought her a dozen roses, and she threw them in the trash and told him not to waste money like that ever again. I think a third woman in the group echoed the feelings of many of us when she replied, “I don’t know who I feel more sorry for, you or your husband.”

Maybe it’s the way I was raised. I never remember my father going to work without first kissing my mother goodbye and telling her that he loved her and her saying the same thing back to him. They went through some rough years in their lives, being separated by war and burying three of their children as infants, as well as two adult sons, and I’m sure they had their arguments, but I never remember them doing so. Things like that were kept behind closed doors. They were married 55 years, so I guess they must have been doing something right. One of the most valuable pieces of advice my father gave me and that I have always remembered is that when it comes to a wife, treat her every day of your marriage just like you would on your first date. Open doors for her, compliment her, let her know you appreciate everything she does, and that she is the most important person in the world to you. My old man didn’t have a lot of formal schooling, but the older I get, the more I realize how wise he was.

And finally, here’s a chuckle to start your day from the collection of funny signs we see in our travels and that our readers share with us.

Congratulations Pam Beers, winner of our drawing for a hardcover edition of the RV camping journal donated by Barbara House. Barbara makes several variations of these, and they all have pages where you can list the date, weather, where you traveled to and from that day, beginning and ending mileage, campground information including amenities at RV sites, a place for campground reviews, room to record activities, people met along the way, reminders of places to see and things to do the next time you’re in the area, and a page for notes for each day.

We had 29 entries this time around. Stay tuned, a new contest starts soon. Note: Due to the high shipping cost of printed books and Amazon restrictions on e-books to foreign countries, only entries with US addresses and e-mail addresses are allowed.

Thought For The Day – Life isn’t tied with a big red bow, but it’s still a gift.

Nick Russell

World-Famous, New York Times Best Selling Author, and All-Around Nice Guy!

  9 Responses to “Let’s Get Intimate”

  1. Nick you are 100% correct about how to treat a lady. My husband & I have been married 33 years. He holds my hand, opens the doors, etc. Only thing we don’t do anymore is exchange cards on birthday’s, anniversary, Christmas etc. Living full-time in our RV we really have no where to set it up or store them. So we just go to the store, pick out a card and hand it to each other. 😂🤣😂🤣
    Sounds cheap, but we have fun. That’s one thing, we always make each other laugh.
    We must be doing something right….33 years and living in a 300 Sq ft RV for the past 16 years. Still love each other more & more each day. I am Blessed ❤️

  2. I am sure you mean well, Nick, but you don’t realize how offensive your post is to so many women. Your father was a product of a misogynistic generation that believed women were fragile beings that had to be pampered and praised to be fulfilled and he, unfortunately, passed that on to you. I am a 38 year old professional woman with a master’s degree. I don’t need a man to hold my hand, open doors for me, and tell me what a pretty little thing I am. Neither does your wife or any woman. We are better than that, and so should you be.

  3. Dianna,
    I find it offensive that you would imply that I am a weak, needy little woman who needs my hand held and to be told what a pretty little thing I am. I was a young wife (graduating from high school 6 moths pregnant) and mother who wound up divorced, with four young children to raise and an immature, narcissistic, selfish ex who didn’t feel he had enough to pay child support and live in the lifestyle that he preferred. Guess which he chose. I raised those children without taking a dime from the government or any other agency and worked my way up through the ranks, paying my own way until I wound up with my contractors’ license, running a shop for a multi-state business owner for many years before I met Nick and we married. I don’t NEED a man… I CHOOSE to love and be loved by Nick! If you are offended, YOU have the problem, not me!
    Terry Russell

  4. I also have two college degrees and worked in the professional field for many years before retirement. All of those years I had a very loving supportive husband, just as I was to him in his career. He also opened doors for me and held my hand, but at 5’8″ and 230 pounds I was never a delicate little flower. I was and am a wife who was respected and loved very much. Kudos to you on your own career, your sacrifices as a working mother, and as a happily married woman in a strong, stable relationship!

  5. I want to be Mss Terry when I grow up! What a lady!

  6. Way to go Terry. Kick ass and take names!

  7. No one wants to read about your intimate and personal “spooning” moments. It turns our stomachs just thinking about. TMI!

  8. Geezo! Some women took offense to your post Nick…holy smokes! Their mad as a wet hen responses cracked me up! You and Miss Terry have a wonderful life together, and I am so happy for both of you! Your spooning is just like what my husband and I would do, except we would say to each other…”Turn over and give me butt”! Hahaha! He crossed over 4 years ago, and I miss him dearly!

    All the best,
    Linda Joe

  9. I’m a couple days behind on my blog reading, so I don’t know if this will be seen, but I just felt the need to comment.

    Nick, your parents raised you right and taught you the right way to treat a lady. I don’t think anyone who knows Miss Terry or has read about her in your blog could ever believe that she is a fading flower. She amazes me with her variety of skills, from carpentry and other other skills that remodeled your old bus into a home on wheels to cooking up delicious meals from scratch (and often fixing two different meals to accommodate your dislike for veggies 😀) to loving your children and grandchildren (and them loving and respecting her). Miss Terry is absolutely correct in saying she doesn’t “need” a man, but she is very blessed to have you as an equal partner to share the last 25 years and many more of love with. Don’t ever stop telling us about your twice a day cuddling; you do not give TMI and those who can’t handle reading about a married couple enjoying time together, snuggling (or anything else) need to get a life.

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