Jun 262019

Today let’s discuss problems in the bedroom. Don’t worry. I’m not talking about any difficulties Miss Terry and I have in the boudoir. For a couple of old farts, we seem to manage okay. But apparently not everybody is so lucky, based on some of the emails I’ve been getting lately.

The other day I heard from a couple who are RV shopping and found a new fifth wheel that they really like. The floorplan is great, the décor is nice, and they love the two big screen televisions in it. The only thing they both agreed they didn’t care for at all is the wimpy mattress that came with the trailer. The woman described it as being as thin as a stack of truck stop pancakes, and she told her husband they would definitely have to replace that if they purchased the trailer. The salesman told them that he could special order a mattress from one of his suppliers and the husband suggested they just take the mattress off their bed at home before they sell everything to go fulltime RVing.

They were taken aback when the salesman told them that it is illegal to put a mattress not made for an RV in one. According to him, all RV mattresses have to be RV certified. She remembered me talking about the memory foam mattress we got from Sam’s Club a few years ago and told him that she knew at least one person who had a “non-certified” mattress in their RV. His response was that if that person ever got pulled over and their RV was inspected, the best they could hope for would be a large fine, and more likely it would be towed away and impounded. He did tell them that he could get the same mattress and have “the guys in the shop treat it” so would be RV certified for “a couple hundred dollars” but said it was really better if he ordered a new mattress for them. When asked how it was treated to come into RV compliance, he was vague and said he would have to ask his manager about that, and the manager was conveniently on vacation. I wrote back and told to them walk away from that dealership and don’t look back. I know there are a lot of shysters out there selling RVs, which makes life difficult for the honest salesmen, but I think this one takes the cake.

Another couple contacted me asking advice about a bedroom dilemma they are having. They said that they have three large dogs and when they were living at home the dogs had the run of the house and each dog had its own doggie bed. Now they are in a motorhome on their first long trip as fulltimers and the dogs have taken over the bedroom. They said that there is not room for the three doggie beds they had at home, and every night while they are taking their showers the dogs jump on the bed and spread out to where there is no room for them. They said they have pushed the dogs off the bed but they jump right back on. They have pushed them off the bed and closed the bedroom door, but then the dogs howl, bark, and scratch on the door all night long.

They’ve only been on the road for two weeks or so and suspect that it is some sort of an anxiety thing the dogs are going through and hope it will ease up. Meanwhile, the husband is sleeping in the recliner and the wife is on the couch. They asked my advice and I told them that allowing the situation to go on like it is will only make it more difficult. The dogs have decided the bed is theirs and seem to have the owners pretty well trained already. Somebody has to be in charge, and only they can decide if it will be them or their critters.

As for the third bedroom email I got, it seems to me that this is a situation the couple has lived with for a long time. But things have gotten worse since they bought their RV and started traveling. The wife reports that her husband snores terribly, and has ever since they got married. She said he has tried everything from those Breathe Right® strips you see advertised to a device that goes in the mouth at night, to an Expiratory positive airway pressure (EPAP) machine, and a white noise device to hopefully mask his snoring, and nothing has worked. Neither has consultations with several doctors.

She said they will be celebrating their 15th anniversary later this year, and for all of those years they have had separate bedrooms and keep the bedroom doors closed because she can’t sleep due to his loud snoring. Now they are in an RV and there is no extra bedroom. They have tried having one of them sleep on the couch and one in the bed, alternating every other night, but quarters are so close that she still isn’t getting any sleep.

I wonder if Dr. Phil gets questions like this? I have no idea what they can do about that. Maybe get two RVs, or a small trailer to pull behind their motorhome? Any suggestions, anybody?

Thought For The Day – So what if I don’t know the meaning of the word apocalypse? It’s not like it’s the end of the world.

Nick Russell

World-Famous, New York Times Best Selling Author, and All-Around Nice Guy!

  8 Responses to “Problems In The Bedroom”

  1. Earplugs.

  2. We bought our travel trailer with bunks so the grandkids could camp with us for short periods. We both snore, so he takes the front bedroom and I take the bottom bunk. Works perfect for us.

  3. The husband in the 3rd scenario should have a sleep study. Untreated sleep apnea can be deadly, but it can often be successfully treated by use of a CPAP device, which will also eliminate the snoring.

  4. Snoring like that indicates a problem breathing. The husband should see his doctor – a very simple surgery might solve the problem, and then he would be able to breathe better during the day, too.

  5. Earplugs for the wife and a sleep apnea test for the husband.

  6. My late husband snored…a lot! After he died, I wished I could hear him snoring beside me again.

  7. I am the person with the snoring husband, He has been to at least a dozen drs. about the problem and they all say its not sleep apena it’s the weird shape of his upper palate and the back of his throat that does it. He tried the CPAP machine, that didn’t help either. Even sitting up in a recliner to sleep doesn’t change anything.

  8. David has a c-pap. Can’t sleep without it he stops breathing every 8 seconds
    Love the read today

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