Aug 132018

I get a lot of questions from new and wannabe RVers, as well as experienced road warriors, and I always try to answer them to the best of my ability. And if I don’t know the answer, I try to steer them to a source who can provide it. But sometimes I get something I just don’t have an answer for and I feel the need to get snarky. I don’t necessarily do it, but there are times I really want to. Here are some examples that I have received in the last month or so.

Q. I have a three-quarter ton pickup. Will I have any problem towing my trailer? If so, where?
A. How can I possibly answer that question? If you are towing a small 4 x 6’ utility trailer with a riding lawnmower in it, you shouldn’t have any problem anywhere. If are you towing a 40 foot triple slide fifth wheel RV trailer, you’re going to probably have some difficulty, especially in hilly or mountainous country. And even if you can pull it, the next question is, do you have enough truck to stop it?

Q. What’s the best route to Green Bay, Wisconsin in a 36 foot gas powered motorhome towing a Jeep?
A. If you are in Milwaukee, take Interstate 43 north to Green Bay. But if you are in Phoenix, Miami, or Philadelphia, or anywhere else in the country, that route won’t work. There are a lot of highways out there and a lot of places to start out from. I’m going to need a little more information before I can help you.

Q. We have been fulltiming for six months and we made the decision ahead of time not to tow a vehicle with us. Why don’t RV parks provide loaner cars to their guests, or have cars available to rent for a small fee?
A. Probably for the same reason that Budget and Avis and Enterprise don’t have RV hookups in their parking lots.

Q. What do I do about crazy campground neighbors who constantly complain about my dog’s barking? This isn’t just one neighbor someplace we are going to be leaving soon, this seems to be a problem everywhere we go. It seems like every time we return from a trip away from the coach some neighbor has to lay into us about our dog’s barking while we are gone.
A. Gee, I don’t know. Have you considered doing something to shut your dog up so it’s not driving the neighbors crazy?

Q. Why do so many RV parks accept weekend reservations months ahead if time during the summer? It makes it hard for those of us who don’t like making reservations to find a site.
A. Oh, those dumb RV park owners. They really do believe that a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. I guess my question to you is, why do you think they should not accept a reservation from someone who plans ahead and wants to pay for it in advance, instead of waiting expectantly because you might or might not show up?

And here is my personal all time favorite, and one we have been asked since our very first days of RVing and publishing the Gypsy Journal.
Q. I would like to have your collection of back issue CDs (or some other product we sell) but we are on a fixed income. Can you give us a discount, or possibly send one free, since we are senior citizens?
A. I wish somebody would fix my income, because it’s broken. It’s never enough to buy everything I want to have.

Congratulations Ellen Hall, winner of our drawing for an audiobook of my friend Suzie O’Connell’s Starlight Magic, from her popular Northwest romance series. We had 33 entries this time around. Stay tuned, a new contest starts soon!

Thought For The Day – I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

Nick Russell

World-Famous, New York Times Best Selling Author, and All-Around Nice Guy!

  9 Responses to “Sometimes I Have To Get Snarky”

  1. Welcome back, Bad Nick!

  2. Well Nick as I always say “You can’t fix stupid”.

  3. Well, Nick, I remember an answer someone said one time about giving directions. Someone asked them how to get somewhere (it doesn’t matter where in particular) and he just told them “You can’t get there from here, you have to start from someplace else!” Works every time!

  4. I just about died laughing at some of these Nick! Seems like I hear versions of things just like this everyday everywhere I go. Makes life so much more fun!

  5. Bwahahahahaha!

  6. On spot!

  7. These are funny, but whenever I think of giving answers like that I figure the people who asked the foolish question to begin with won’t have the wherewithall to see the answer as funny.

  8. Ya…hoooo! Bad Nick Rides Again…particularly with the appropriate “thought for the day”!…my wife is still laughing.

  9. Thank you for making me smile today. Love, love, the questions… You are kinder than me…

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