Oct 202009

I remember the good old days of my youth, back when I was ten feet tall and bulletproof. Time and circumstance taught me that I was neither, but sometimes I miss those days when I was too dumb to know just how much I didn’t know, and too careless to care.

I’m reminded of that now when I get out of bed in the morning and my body snaps, crackles, and pops more than a bowl of cereal. I hear my Dad making those groans and sighs he did every morning, and then I remember that the old man has been gone nearly 25 years, and realize it’s me making those noises! Me? No way! Those are my Dad’s noises!

Terry and I were talking the other day about how everything has to have a name and a cure these days. I can’t just be stiff and sore because I abused my body as a youngster, and now that I’m getting older, it has come back to haunt me.

What we used to call paratroopers’ knees, from too many hard landings, now must be some sort of cartilage damage or deficiency, and a good arthroscopic surgeon could probably fix that right up.

Those banged up vertebrae must be reason for some hack to take a hacksaw to me. So what if a couple of Advil makes them tolerable until I loosen up? That’s just treating the symptoms, let’s treat the root cause of the problem! All it takes is a minor incision, a hammer and chisel, and few months of traction!

When I was a kid, I never heard of fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, and depression. If I hurt, I was told to walk it off, if I was tired, go take a nap. And if I ever said I was depressed, the immediate response would have been “I’ll give you something to be depressed about!”  

Every time I turn on the television I am bombarded by advertisements promising this pill or that potion will make me happier, make me as randy as a sailor on shore leave, and even make my hair grow back!

There are just as many commercials from attorneys telling me that if that pill or potion made me happy, hairy, and studly, but now I have to wear a diaper and I hear voices in my head, we’ll sue the SOBs who sold it to me!

There is a huge industry that has grown up around helping us deny that our bodies are machines, and that as we get a few miles on those machines, they let us know it. Just take this pill and all of your problems will go away.

An even larger industry has been created so we can sue the people who sold us the pill in the first place. And if we win, we can take the 20% or so the lawyer didn’t keep and just go away.

Not me. I prefer to age gracefully, thank you just the same. Even though, if you were to ask Miss Terry, she’d tell you that there is nothing graceful about me getting my body into an upright position every morning. Getting old isn’t for sissies or wimps!

Thought For The Day – Your best friend may not always tell you what you want to hear, but rather what you need to hear.

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Nick Russell

World-Famous, New York Times Best Selling Author, and All-Around Nice Guy!

  14 Responses to “Getting Old Isn’t For Sissies”

  1. Nick —

    I laugh everytime I hear some of the side effects of so many prescription drugs. But the one that cracks me up is the warning to call your doctor if you have a 4-hour erec_ _ _ _.
    I would not call my doctor, I’d borrow your little black book and make some phone calls.

  2. Sounds to me like Bad Nick has beaten Good Nick over the head and taken over his blog!

  3. Okay Dr. Phill, we get the message. You are right, “Getting old isn’t for sissies or wimps!”

    Now back to the world of touring. Today we head south out of this cold Iowa weather.


  4. I agree with Gene, thought I was reading Bad Nick, had to recheck the URL!! LOL

    Also agree, these tain’ the golden years, they are the rusty ones! Getting old is NOT for sissies!!

    Now off to yet ANOTHER medical checkup. SIGHHHH

  5. Nick, we thought you were writing about US! I make my Dad’s noises, Suzy sounds like her Mom used to. I certainly agree with George abour borrowing your black book in the case of a 4-hour erec….

    We also laugh at the commercials that caution, “Tell your doctor if you are planning surgery!” What? I can’t just carve myself up, I have to tell my doctor first?

  6. Great post! Right on the money. But you forgot how our wonderful government’s new health care system is going to take care of us. LOL Or at least take care of those who bought and paid for our Congressional leaders.

  7. Hey, give me a break! Gene yells at me when I write about where we had dinner, and Jerry and Suzy are tired of hearing about Michele Henry, Al Hesselbart, and the Speidels! I had to write about SOMETHING!!! 🙂

  8. Nick, It’s just a number. Think of one you like better, and just implant it into your mind . . . now say after me, “I’m 29 and doing fine, I’m 29 and doing fine, I’m 2 . . .ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

  9. I say that someone twenty years older then I is an old person. Think like that and you will never get old.

  10. Amen!!
    George, you crack me up!!

  11. Nick, I understand completely. Two years ago, just after turning 65, the docs decided to do an “in frame” major overhaul. I recovered from their “practice” but have to agree with you that getting all them parts and pieces headed the same direction at the same time can be entertaining..

  12. Nick, I think the commercials have had a huge impact on my aging life. I continually stop watching TV to stare at my legs sure “restless leg syndrome” is about to start. I wouldn’t have known there was such a thing to worry about if it hadn’t been brought up by the drug companies. Also, you need to look at the positive. Never before have we seen so many gray haired actors employed. Of course, they all have something wrong with them that only the drug companies and your doctor can fix but hey………. As for the 4 hour deal — I say, grab on to that guy. Who cares if he is blind and deaf later?????????????? The really talented folks are the ones who can speak so rapidly that the “fine print” you fail to read is stated so quickly you still don’t know what the side effects are. We all may want to rethink this whole thing about TV/drug company commercials and info-mercials — these are really mind teasers. Use them to keep yourself alert and inquisitive. While the rest of our bodies fall apart, our minds will be racing right along with our thumping restless leg syndrome. I know I don’t want to miss anything. I can get my hospital bed in place (hopefully at a good sale price) early with just the right set up for meds to be close at hand. Then maybe Jack K.’s book on taking an early out… So many things offered on TV today, so many thoughts, so many decisions…………..

  13. Whew!!! That wyoming gal wears me out,,,she need her own Blog!!

    I just wanted to tell you, at your young age “You ain’t seen NOTHING yet”!!!!

  14. It’s tuff gettin’ old. I had knee replacements (both at same time) and it did wonders for being able to walk again. I was bowlegged and every step hurt. Now, its much better.
    But a lot of other body parts do not work like they used to and we all have to live with that until they come up with new parts. But think of all the good time we had making these old body’s hurt the way they do!!!
    Jim Mossman

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